| August 10, 2008 | When 'None-of-the-Above' isn't Enough Norm Reynolds |
Good Day! I am delighted to see so many out this morning. Just the idea that all of you would rather hear a Sunday homily on When None of the Above isn’t Enough, rather than stay home and tend to your gardens on a lovely day like this---it makes me feel there is something wonderful about the world—yet.
When None of the Above isn’t Enough. How many of you have some idea of what I mean by this wacky title? It is kind of an insider’s smirk about Unitarians. In our desperation to imagine a world full of signed up members, we sometimes imagine that everyone who fills out census or hospital forms and passes over allthe established religious affiliations to check the’ None of the Above’ box is really a Unitarian—or would be if they only knew!
The “ isn’t Enough” part comes from a provocative and insightful little book entitled, The Almost Church By Michael Durall.
I want to underscore the provocative description because there is a lot in this book on “Redefining Unitarian Universalism for a New Era” that I disagree with—strongly at times. But the fascinating part is that even when—or especially when—I disagree with it I feel led to some really significant insights about not only the future of UUs but also about the place of spiritual community generally in a commoditized and endangered world that seems to have become so lost in the mechanisms of ---How, that it has forgotten to ask the most important question of all—Why?
Provocative and fascinating? Indeed! This small book is so provocative and fascinating that before I presented this talk in the Comox Valley, at least four members of our congregation had phoned me up in great excitement to say—Norm I just read this really provocative and fascinating little book; we’ve got to talk!
So let’s do that—if you would like to ask a question or comment on any of the material this morning, I’d love to have you join me in the discussion that has been set up for after the service. Indeed I think this morning is just the introduction to a discussion that we will want to continue in our dinner circles, chalice groups and maybe it would even make a great reason to invite a couple of friends over for coffee.
So what does author Mike Durall say that is so provocative and fascinating?
Well, to start with he says that for all the differences we imagine between ourselves and other religious traditions, we are stuck in the same 1950s rut as most churches and church goers these days—We show up at church Sunday Mornings because we’ve been doing it for a long time, the service is short, the coffee hot and a number of our friends will be there.
This may seem an all too easy and outdated criticism to many of you. Unfortunately-- Durall backs up this observation with some troubling statistics about persistently flat lined membership, about congregations struggling to find volunteers to fill vital roles on the board, on committees and even to just put out the coffee.
In 1999 a major study of church attendance found that only 6% of North American (NA) churches were actually growing. I say actually because studies of what people say about church attendance show much higher numbers. Apparently many more people would like to think they attend church than actually make it through the door.
Durall believes that we, like 94% of NA churches, need to “reinvent ourselves” or face oblivion by mid-century. Our particular faith tradition has been especially compromised by the attempt to be all things to all people and to offend no one. If current trends continue half of our current congregations will not be here in another 25 years.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately because I’m on an email list for presidents of Canadian UU congregations. I hasten to confess that I don’t belong on this list.. I think Mary Bennett, our CUC Executive Director, must have decided that anyone who serves on so many committees must be the president of something. So one day I, by no action of my own, started getting all these emails addressed to CUC presidents. And before I could get around to telling someone I wasn’t who they thought I was – --this really interesting conversation over what’s important about Unitarian Universalist churches broke out.
So…this email among mostly presidents, was really fascinating and disturbing as well. It actually shocked me to find how many on the list seemed to agree that the reason we have Unitarian churches is so people who don’t feel comfortable in “a church” can have a place to meet.The purpose of the church is then, obviously, to serve the interests and needs of those who show up—whoever happens to wander in. Exactly as Durall suggests.
But here is where I agree and disagree with Durall. I agree completely with Duvall’s criticism that None-of-the -Above just isn’t enough.
If Unitarianism were simply about creating a space where tolerant people could talk, I’d say let’s circle the chairs down at Tim Horton’s, share some organic fair trade coffee and leave a big tip for those who clean up after us.
But here is also where I disagree with Durall.
The thing that inspires me to respond to our annual canvas, sign up for committees and officiate at various rites of passage is the conviction that Thomas Jefferson was right – Unitarian values constitute an inextricable,necessary condition for democracy as well as the benefits, responsibilities and rights of a pluralist society.
Democracy without respect for the inherent worth of every individual, without a passionate commitment to justice, equity, and compassion, the right of conscience, and the goal of a peaceful world community –without these spiritual values--democracy is virtually a worthless concept meaning –at best -- the tyranny of the majority and the down grading of citizen to consumer.
My experience has convinced me that Durall is absolutely right when he points out that few people do or will come to our services simply because we don’t ask them to believe in a rigidly defined religious doctrine.
To become a vital faith with a firm foothold on the 21st century we must continue our commitment to tolerance and understanding, and we will have to learn to build on that understanding in order to reach out to other faith communities to build what could be called “spiritual capacity – an understanding of the place of spiritual community in addressing the great challenges of our times.
Clearly the massive social transformation needed to address the consequences of greenhouse gas fuelled climate change is causing many people to question the central paradigm of our age--that greed is the good we seek.
Instead of focusing on differences over tribal gods, goddesses and religious doctrines, the relevant spiritual communities of the twenty-first century will be places where members can talk to each other (and especially with their children) about really important spiritual matters like: What is truly valuable? Why am I here? How am I connected to other people and beyond to other creatures and all of life? What does it mean? Is there more to me than myself or the values that can be accounted for on a balance sheet? How did our society ever come to believe that the sum of our collective greed is our common good?” Is it possible to define “valuable” outside of a sacred awe of all existence and a life of service and compassion?
The problem, in my view, isn’t that we don’t have a higher purpose in coming together as a spiritual community; the problem is that we don’t say it clearly and enthusiastically. We tend to smile all too knowingly when we hear a joke like
Q: Why did the Unitarian-Universalist cross the road?
A: To support the chicken in its search for its own path
According to Durall we talk about growing our fellowships, but really growing a congregation isn’t an oh, whatever proposition. Until we, at both regional and congregational levels, start putting 10 percent of our revenues into outreach we are doomed to the role of an Almost Church.
Music. The thing about Mike Durall is he is a professional consultant on vitalizing and growing churches. He’s done the research. When he says we have to change the way we do music, I think we need to listen.
Too often—I think, we treat music as if it is about words; about a chance to say again what we’re going to hear from the pulpit. If that was what music is about, why wouldn’t we just have a couple more responsive readings? When you really think about it, music is about feeling; it’s about loosening up andbeing spiritual community rather than talking about it.
Giving. On this issue Durall scores 100% from me. Whether it is in pledging to support our spiritual home financially or serving on the board or setting up coffee for after church, we ask way too trepidatiously.
Giving is a gift –not just to our fellowship but most importantly it is a gift of commitment and engagement to ourselves. Unless we are happy with an almost church, we need to have much higher expectations of ourselves and our members. We need to attend services regularly, to invest more time, energy and money in our chosen religious community.
How many times do we say among ourselves, now make sure you don’t ask that new, really-excited-to-be-among-us guest to volunteer to help in stewarding our fellowship? We don’t want to scare anyone away. But Durall says that is exactly the wrong idea. Don’t tell the new guest that we don’t expect much of them--that we really don’t need them right now.
Say—instead—Hello guest. Isn’t this a fantastic place to be? Have you heard that Unitarians are actually the Spiritual Face of Democracy? Have you heard about our chalice groups that bring people together to build a sense of personal connection between members? Oh, by the way we are such a dynamic organization, we already have an important role for you.
Now there are several issues on which I don’t agree with the Almost Church analysis. Durall says that we aren’t friendly……..How on earth anyone could say that we aren’t friendly is entirely beyond me. I mean this past November Nancy and I were in Victoria for the Fall Gathering. Seventeen years ago Nancy and I lived in Victoria and attended your church there for a short while.
But last November you would have thought we were just getting home from a short vacation. You remembered our names, our children’s names; members of this congregation remember things about us that I’ve long since forgotten. I think that at one point there was a line up to sit beside us at the dinner table. We Unitarians may be stingy, but we are not unfriendly.
Another thing I had difficulty with in this –still fascinating—book, is the suggestion that in the fully functional Church of the future there won’t be any potlucks!
There will be meals but they will be truly sumptuous, professionally catered repasts………But I like potlucks. I think there is something special about all those loving hands creating special dishes and sharing in the spirit of community. I’ve been to lots of professionally catered banquets and I wouldn’t trade any one of them for the kind of banquet with kids running around, people talking, and the strange mixture of foods potluck that we Unitarians do so well. like potlucks. I think there is something special about all those loving hands creating special dishes and sharing in the spirit of community. I’ve been to lots of professionally catered banquets and I wouldn’t trade any one of them for the kind of banquet with kids running around, people talking, and the strange mixture of foods potluck that we Unitarians do so well.
So speaking of professionals, Durall suggests that--No he argues strongly that--one of the key UU failings is we don’t treat our ministers like they are messengers from God………
Yes, I had to read this one several times before I realized this wasn’t another one of those Unitarian jokes. But he is serious.
I’ll quote briefly Durall’s observation about successful churches. “The sheep do not lead the shepherd. Nor do the sheep discipline the shepherd, by means of performance reviews or congregational surveys. The minister is called to lead and expected to lead. I believe that we should empower clergy, not make them a vehicle for prevailing views, thoughts, and opinions”
Now here is the shocking thing to me—
After I read this section of the book over a couple of times, I began seeing some real wisdom in what he was saying; --especially when he refined the argument with a more palatable observation.
“Congregations should be in the business of empowering their leaders to reach out and serve when opportunities arise; and take risks when necessary, so our churches can become engaged in the large world in ever-greater ways. Churches seldom die from taking risks. They expire from becoming complacent.
Churches with fortitude are the churches of the future.”
This also has been a topic of the email discussion. How much do we want to trust and empower our leaders to lead? Would we be comfortable with a Martin Luther King, Jr.? On one Unitarian email a member was complaining bitterly that one of our Unitarian leaders had spoken out on an issue that he disagreed with.
Personally, the sheep metaphor troubles me. I like the idea that ministers serve the membership rather than the other way around. But how can we balance this democratic principle with the desire/need to bring out the best in our leaders and the leadership in all of us? What is the leadership direction that our churches should be pursuing today? Should it be spiritual leadership as well as administrative?
The really essential leadership issue which Durall addresses is the all too frequent scenario where churches are swept into bickering over personal agendas and small differences of opinion rather than focusing on a clear and informed vision of what creates congregational health, vitality, meaning and purpose.
We’re just all too human after all; it’s just all too easy to draw battle lines over whether we are going to have two or three songs in a service and forget that we actually come here to love one another and care for this beautiful planet.
I have to confess that this is a failing I recognize all too easily in the mirror.
Fascinating book—yes! Provocative—yes! Worth discussing—yes! Right on—um,…Sometimes.
I encourage you to read it carefully and critically And yes, be sure to share and discuss it.
I will close with this comment by Mike Durall:
The primary purpose of the church is to create a community of compassion: all else flows from this. Unitarian Universalist churches should call their members to lead lives of dedication and commitment – lives not just of success, but also of service…. Unitarian Universalist churches should call their members to lead lives of dedication and commitment – lives not just of success, but also of service….
Our members need to be convinced that participating in this spiritual community will change their lives significantly for the better; that being a member will empower them to go out and make the world a better place. To make the congregation flourish, everyone that stays here needs to get past just being an observer and become a participant, to get beyond seeing themselves as consumers and become producers, creators and nurturers of the soul of their congregation.”
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